On New Years night I found myself lying in a hospital bed. Blood tests, EKG, X-Rays of my Chest – it was not what Lisa the kids and I had in mind for ushering in 2009!

For the past month I have been working about 15 to 18 hours each day. With the economy and the fear that has gripped America and the rest of the world, our support has dropped both personally for our family and for the orphans that we care for. So, I have gone to work brokering International contracts... it is grueling, but very interesting work. (It hasn't paid off yet, but we have hope)!

Back to the 6 hour hospital visit; as I was lying there, thinking about a New Year ushering in, how I was going to provide for my family; how we could possibly continue supporting our work around the globe – the Lord reminded me, once again, of something I have taught over and over... "It's not about you, but, I am allowing you to be all about it"!

Life in the "Kingdom" is not about you and me. God will get His job done with our without us, believe it or not! He doesn't need me!! That is hard for a semi-narcissistic guy like me to swallow...

God allows you and I to jump in the river – the river of mystery that calls to the deep place in each one of us that cries out, "There must be more" – The Lord doesn't need us, because, He can always find someone to say "YES" – but... He allows you and I to participate if we want... it's all about the "Yes" in our heart.

As they were releasing me from the hospital, (By the way, I am fine; just needing another surgery over the next month or so), He reminded me how fragile and fast life is. His "Kingdom" will move forward; He will win and you and I can jump in and be a part or stand on the side-lines and watch.

In my frailty and insignificance, I still choose to jump in... how about you?