I have received a lot of feed-back, mostly positive, on the “Generation Killers” blogs… if you would like to add your thought, or have other “Killers” that would help; please let me know – I would love to post them.
More “killers” to come, but here are a few comments thus far:
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The world needs to hear this so badly. I wish I had this standard set before me when I was growing up. Instead, I had this stupid idea that if it wasn’t intercourse it wasn’t sex. How rediculous the lies are that we believe.
Even into adulthood, I have struggled with not giving my heart away. I never learned how to protect myself. As soon as a guy gave me a little attention and made me feel wanted, I put my heart on a platter. Of course, it always came back chewed up and spit out.
I still struggle with what it looks like get to know somebody in a healthy way. I think I set myself up to avoid it out of fear of repeating past patterns.
I really wish somebody had taken the time to teach me how to guard my heart, before I made all those bad choices.
Posted on 8/27/2008 1:17:11 AM
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I have been involved w/ youth ministry for 17 years now…It was around 10 years ago that I came to this same conclusion and I have caught very little but grief for it ever since. I do not see ANY benifits of dating that cannot be had in a group setting.
I do however, see a myriad of negatives that ALWAYS plague even the most pure of relationships. The confusion about what the other person is thinking/feeling. The time spent trying to figure out what they are not saying. The mental and emotional energy that is wasted…
Thank you for boldly speaking the truth. It encourages me to continue doing the same.
Wes
8 | (matthew |
So true, but what the hell are we going to do about it? Can’t wait to dream with all of you brilliant men, not only dream, but actually start doing the stuff…
Posted on 8/26/2008 7:21:27 AM
I remember reading an article by a Christian leader who suggested going on at least 30 dates before making the final decision. But this guy was just talking about going on a date, not the sort of “dating” you talk about.
I think the big deal here is that people, especially young Christians, take dating so seriously. They think, as did I for a while, if they went on a date they’ve got to start dating the person. They make that initial commitment, yet prolong the final one for fear they may have chosen wrongly.
I think expanding our horizons by going on multiple dates with multiple people (OK, maybe not 30, but more than 5) will help us get a better idea of who we want in a spouse and in the end reduce that high divorce rate in the church. I mean just taking a girl out to see how it goes without either party placing expectations on the other.
yes, Seth, I would agree with this when you are in your mid-20’s. I would not agree when you are in your teens… we must develop our spiritual lives and our brains before we even start to think this way! It takes time and when you give your heart and dating life to the Lord in your teens – I like to call it – “Tithing your teen years” – you set yourself up for an amazing covenantal marriage!
love the 2nd comment Gary. as someone who did this … even if it was kind of UNintentionally 🙂 …. i couldn’t agree with you more. i feel like i’m mid-way through my 20s and still developing all of this. I didn’t know who i was 3 years ago, let alone 6 or 8.
thanks for this perspective … brilliant.
blessings to you and the family.
this is such an important message baby,
preach on!